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Hola Paola

Fashion, Beauty and Lifestyle Blog by Paola Morales

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REAL TALKS

Real Talks: Big Girls Don’t Cry

October 2, 2018      2 Comments

It has been over a month since I last published anything on the blog, but today I’m back with one of my favourite sections the #RealTalks. With this post you will understand why I’ve been absent . . . So keep reading 🙂

 

I’ve named this post “Big Girls Don’t Cry” – yes, like Fergies’ song. Because today I want to break this perceived model that has been sold to us over the past few years due to the rise of womanly empowerment and feminism concepts. I also want to make clear that yes, I am big supporter of both of these movements. However I am conscious to mention this support without over-eagerness or extremism because to me, this is where these two can lose their initial real and well-intentioned meanings.

One could argue that they have made us believe that a strong woman is one who does not cry and shows happiness even when her life is falling apart. For me, the definition of a strong woman is the opposite. It is someone who has the emotional ability to know when to ask for help without this meaning that she is weak.

There are exceptions of course and I am not trying to encourage you to go from corner to corner crying and pouring out your sorrows even to the postman. Rather to learn how to deal with your emotions instead of covering them with makeup and hiding them with a fake smile.

This past month has been one of the roughest of the year for me. I have had to live many uncomfortable, sad and stressful moments. These were mainly related to that of stability – probably something that everyone who is an immigrant has suffered through and can relate to. These situations have led me to develop some anxiety and have effectively blocked all my creative senses – hence the lack of new blog content on the blog . . .

I have always considered myself a strong and independent woman. One of those people who knows how to fix herself alone and the one who can solve everything. The truth is that we can not have the answer or the solution to every single problem and it has been hard for me to accept this fact. Sometimes we feel lonely not because we really are, but because we do not have the courage to go to someone else to at least speak up.

I am still all the things I mentioned above, even stronger because I understood that I did not need to deal with everything I was going through on my own. I am so lucky and grateful to have loads of people around me who love me and care about me and with whom I can count on during the good times, but especially during the bad times. Today I want to invite you to be strong, not by stopping crying – but through accepting when you NEED to seek help and knowing who you can trust.

“The real strength is the ability to know when you need help and have the power to overcome your fears to ask for it.”

 

Love,

Paola.


Hace más de un mes que no pasaba por aquí y hoy estoy de regreso con un post de los que más me gusta hacer, los RealTalks. Con este entenderán el por qué de mi ausencia.

El título de esta entrada es “las chicas grandes no lloran”, como la canción de Fergie. Hoy simplemente quiero romper ese paradigma que nos han vendido en los últimos años con el auge de el empoderamiento femenino y el feminismo. Quiero dejarles en claro que soy fiel defensora de ambos conceptos, pero sin afán ni extremismo porque es allí donde pierden su magia y verdadero significado.

Nos han hecho creer que una mujer fuerte es aquella que no llora y se muestra positiva aun cuando su vida se cae a pedazos. Para mi, la definicion de una mujer fuerte es todo lo contrario. Es aquella que tiene la habilidad emocional de saber cuando pedir ayuda sin que esto signifique que sea débil.

Claramente hay excepciones y no estoy tratando de motivarlas a que se la pasen de esquina en esquina llorando y contándole sus penas hasta al cartero. Sino de aprender a lidiar con sus emociones en lugar de taparlas con maquillaje y una falsa sonrisa.

Este último mes para mi ha sido uno de los más rudos de todo el año, me ha tocado vivir muchos momentos incómodos, tristes, estresantes. Sobretodo en temas de estabilidad, que probablemente todo el que sea inmigrante ha padecido. Estas situaciones me han llevado a desarrollar algo de ansiedad y me ha bloqueado todos mis sentidos creativos  – por eso, la falta de contenido en el blog-.

Siempre me he considerado una mujer fuerte, en mi país decimos “Echada pa’ lante”. De las que se las saben arreglar sola, de las que todo lo resuelven. Lo cierto es que no podemos tener la respuesta ni la solución a todo y es eso lo que más me ha costado aceptar. A veces nos sentimos solas no porque realmente lo estemos, sino porque no acudimos a alguien más para al menos hablar.

Yo sigo siendo todas las cosas que mencione arriba, incluso aún más fuerte porque entendí que no necesitaba lidiar con todo lo que sentía sola. Tengo mucha gente a mi alrededor que me quiere y se preocupa por mi y con quien puedo contar en las buenas, pero sobretodo en las malas. Hoy quiero invitarlas a que sean fuertes, no dejando de llorar, sino aceptando cuando NECESITEN buscar ayuda y sabiendo identificar en quién pueden confiar.

“La verdadera fortaleza es la capacidad de saber cuándo necesita ayuda y tener el poder de superar sus miedos para pedirla”

 

Love,

Paola.

 

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  1. Catarina Morais says

    October 2, 2018 at 9:55 pm

    I came from instagram to read what you had to say about this theme and I loved it 🙂

    Kisses, Catarina | Blog // Instagram // Facebook // Bloglovin’

    Reply
    • Paola says

      October 3, 2018 at 11:48 am

      Ahh thank you so much❤️ I’m glad you like it

      Reply

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Paola Morales

Paola Morales

Hola! I am Paola.

Fun latina living in Ireland.
Graduated in Law but my passion for fashion, beauty and living a healthy lifestyle lead me to open my website. I hope you like it !

Recent Posts

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